TULSA, Okla. — The pastor of a north Tulsa church is accused of multiple sexual crimes including raping his daughter.
Harmony Oates is his daughter. She is trying to rebuild what she said he took from her starting when she was in 6th grade.
She wanted to share her story and talked only to 2 News Oklahoma.
She has a message to those living in the shadows.
"It feels like I'm not in the shadows anymore," Oates said. "Think of a 13-year-old girl confused about who true love is because her dad is saying 'I'm your boyfriend.'"
Pastor Bailey invited people into church every week as a strong community leader. This challenged Oates anytime she wanted to speak out.
"I knew how to set a boundary, but whenever he's your father and whenever he's a pastor and whenever he has this authority and he has a record, is like you say no, but what is your no mean."
She suffered alone, in silence as her father inappropriately touched her.
"He would pray over me at first, but he would do a lot of touching while he was praying," said Oates.
She said the years of manipulating made her ask questions. Some of those questions stuck with her over the years and that's part of why she wanted to share her story.
"The thing is whenever I was a kid I separated my dad from who he was. I had to that's the only way I survived," said Oates. "I would call him my best friend only to hide the reality of what I was living."
She said she first told her husband and older brother, then had a difficult conversation with her mom. Now she's taking his alleged sexual abuse public. She's used social media to share her experiences.
"Coming out of the darkness by speaking out, makes you a survivor. That's what I would say," said Oates.
She hopes others feel empowered to speak out. In her recovery, she's rediscovering God separate from her father.
"I'm learning more and I know he has me and he has every other victim. And I know that he has been guiding me through this whole journey and I know he will come for me like a father even though my dad did not," said Oates.
Bertheophilus Maurice Bailey, Sr. is charged with:
- Two counts of 1st-degree rape
- Child sexual abuse
- Forcible sodomy
- Incest
- 1st-degree burglary
Bailey is the pastor at St. Andrew Christian Church in north Tulsa. According to the website he became pastor in 2018. Prior to that, he pastored the Mt. Zion Baptist Church of Claremore for 6 years.
Bailey's daughter posted a public Facebook post regarding allegations against her father.
2 News requested the affidavit from Bailey's arrest but the records are not available at this time. He previously pled guilty to child abuse by injury in 2010 and 2013.
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