TULSA, Okla. — Woman claims abuse by adoptive brother is part of failed foster system
“A literal nightmare,” Alexis Fridenberg called her childhood foster, and ultimately adoptive, home.
At four years old, Fridenberg said she was placed into a home of “career” foster parents.
“That is what they got out of it, the money,” she said.
Just by looking at her home, she can not understand how Oklahoma Human Services, formerly the Department of Human Services (DHS), considered her living situation a safe environment.
“We were living in a five bedroom trailer with 15 kids in it,” she said.
She said while she was eventually adopted, she could not keep track of the number of kids who went in and out of the house over the years.
But problems went much deeper than that.
Alexis said her adoptive brother, the parents’ biological son, Sammy Fridenberg, sexually assaulted her daily from age 7 to 18.
He now faces multiple charges. Court documents show other relatives have come forward alleging abuse as well.
“If DHS came in, my mom would make us act like nothing was happening,” she said.
Alexis’s parents have since passed away, but she believes they went to great lengths to hide the abuse. Recently, she has had four surgeries in four years for severe hereditary endometriosis that went undiagnosed for years.
“Because my mother refused to take me to a doctor, and I think it is because she did not want anyone to know about the sexual abuse,” she said.
Alexis said, as a child, she never felt DHS was advocating for her, that the way caseworkers handle foster kids does not build trust, and that interviewing children in front of foster parents is futile.
“There have been so many times, that if they would have pulled me to the side and been like, ‘hey, what is going on,’ I probably would have said something,” she explained.
At 28 years old, she said she is coming forward because it is time for justice and she wants to see a widespread overhaul at DHS for future generations.
Sammy Fridenberg faces several counts of lewd molestation and soliciting a minor. His next court hearing is in December.
Oklahoma Human Services sent us this statement:
The safety and wellbeing of children, especially those in foster care, is of utmost importance to Oklahoma Human Services. As part of the agency’s practice to ensure ongoing child safety [oklahoma.gov] when children are in foster care, children are interviewed privately, at least monthly in a location where they are able to talk freely about their experiences in the foster home. When there has been an allegation of abuse or neglect in the foster home, additional visits and interviews, including unannounced visits, are expected.
The agency works with courts, District Attorneys and others to protect children and give voluntary or court-ordered services and resources to help families maintain or work toward child safety. While the agency can make recommendations, only a judge can remove children from their home. Child welfare cases are confidential by state and federal statutes, so we are unable to discuss the facts or circumstances of any child welfare case with anyone who is not authorized by statute or permitted by an order of the court.
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